Open Letter: When Someone Comes Out As Trans

 

When Someone Comes Out as Trans

The moment in time when a trans person comes out is of monumentous significance. In this society, nearly all transgender people are forced into hiding for a large part of our lives. And throughout such a time we live in constant fear of what might happen when and if our true identity is discovered. We learn to become someone else, playing the part of someone we know society can more easily accept. And we form relationships with other people under that alternate persona, trying the best we can to adapt and find the love we need to survive such a tortured existence. In most cases we lament in silence as our bodies are permanently transfigured against our will through the puberty of a gender that we don’t belong to. Everyone around us expects us to be someone we simply are not, and eventually no matter how hard we fight, fulfilling these expectations just gets more and more excruciating as time marches on.

According to most reliable statistics, approximately 41% of trans people fully attempt suicide and nearly every single one of us has seriously considered it. Every moment this society crushes us with hate and discrimination and it takes so much strength to keep fighting that our current life expectancy is only around 30-33years. Activities as simple as using the restroom can result in deadly violence, athletics/recreation are not designed to include us, and virulent misinformation is everywhere as even many of our own religious leaders and elected government officials call not only for our exclusion from healthcare, employment, housing, education, and churches, but also publicly call for our outright execution.

When an individual comes out as trans, that person has learned to love themself more than they fear the multitude of adversities armed against them. Before someone comes out, they don’t yet know the rewards of transition, or the relief and joy and freedom that comes with finally being openly oneself, but they do have hope. Holding onto the hope that one day things will be better, that individual finally faces their greatest fears head on and breaks free from the prison of the false persona they built to protect themself from cruelty.

There’s no telling how much a newly out trans person will transform as they embark on the next stage of their journey toward healing and self discovery, but one thing is for sure. The moment a person comes out as trans is a time for celebration and for showing as much love and support as possible. Coming out is tremendously difficult, and almost always results in the death of relationships with many friends and family poisoned by bigotry. In many cases this will be the single most difficult thing a person will ever have to do in their lifetime. But from this moment forward the darkness finally begins to lift and all will be granted the opportunity and the honor to finally meet the authentic version of a truly amazing human being.